Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Carefull what ya bid for, YOU MIGHT JUST GET IT!

Greetings gentle readers. As most of you know, the Sabaku Samurai is a ramblin, gamblin kinda guy who likes to live life on the edge (ar ar, edge, get it? oh never mind). We also know that the Sabaku Samurai appreciates fine southern sippin whiskey and occasionally tosses back a few. On these occasions he has been known for making, shall we say, less than perfect decisions. Recently after participating in a particularly gratifying bourbon bender the Sabaku Samurai began digging around in an on-line auction house that shall remain nameless, called Ebay. Spotting what the booze told him was surely a great bargain and hidden national treasure, he put a ridiculously high bid on a tanto that was listed with a sketchy description and a few blurry distant photographs. Waking up a few hours later (still in front of his computer) the Sabaku Samurai found that he was now the proud owner of the tanto and his prize would arrive in 3 days. Flushed with excitement (or bourbon) the Sabaku Samurai could hardly contain himself for the next 72 hours dreaming of the fabulous Juyo he had managed to snake out from under the nose of all the other collectors in the world who constantly scour Ebay. In fact he sprained his arm trying to pat himself on the back. What arrived was...welllll...uh.....mmmmm....somewhat...dissapointing. The previous owner had apparently decided that the best way to preserve a 350 year old antique was to store it in a vat of salt water. After all, it worked for pickles why not a Samurai Sword? The blade was bent, chipped, tip broken and had some of the nastiest rust he had ever seen. Unfortunately for the Sabaku Samurai the auction was "as is, all sales final, no returns accepted". He was stuck. The only ray of sunshine was that the blade was signed but the tang was so wasted by oxidation it could not be read completely.

 He was bummed. After shedding a few soft tears and fortifying himself with some more liquid libation he came up with a crafty plan. Sabaku Samurai's personal favorite sword polisher of all time is an amazing artist by the name of Mr. Inu Iki Sensei. He was trained in the Honami style of polish and is known for salvaging seriously abused swords. Mr Iki is also known for appreciating the finer qualities of the distillers craft. The Sabaku Samurai brought the tanto and a bottle of his best to the home of Mr Iki and began pouring. After several rounds were dispensed with, the Sabaku Samurai sprung his trap. He produced the decrepit tanto and bet Mr Iki that he could not save the blade. He wagered Mr Iki that he would pay double his going rate for polish if he could successfully get all the rust and chips out and put the blade in full polish or pay him nothing if he could not completely succeed. The gauntlet was thrown down and Mr Iki,who is a very proud man (and a bit tipsy by now), immediately (if a little unsteadily) picked it up and said "I'll take your money you round eyed freak" (he tends to talk this way after he's had a few).

So there you have it. The piece-O-crap tanto is in the capable hands of Inu Iki Sensei. What will be the outcome? Will Sabaku Samurai have to shell out big time and bow to Mr Iki or will Iki Sensei have worked his ass off for no money? Will Iki's polish reign supreme? Only time will tell. We expect the answer in a couple of weeks so stay tuned to the Sabaku Blog for the final result. We'll be BACK! (yeah that's a threat)

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